doris smash (sverbot) wrote in rumandsodomy,
doris smash
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rumandsodomy

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Anyone else start shit with their significant other (i.e. "I'm dumping you!", starting fights over little stuff) just to see their reaction? Just to see your own? I do. Probably too much. Borderline Personality Disorder. No wonder I have no friends...
I haven't cried in quite a long time, and I just "dumped" my boyfriend. I'm crying despite the lovely apathy that comes with hydrocodone.

I really want to SI. But I haven't done it in over a year (there is no space on my limbs for me to cut that isn't already scar tissue), I promised myself I wouldn't do it ever again. But I'm no good at keeping promises. If I cut though, I'll feel even more like shit for letting myself down... I'm all I have right now, so I can't do that. No food for 3 days, instead.

I'm considering getting really REALLY REALLY fat as the ultimate form of SI.
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